Since completing my therapy sessions, I’ve been living the past month or two more “lightly”. Although I think about cancer often, the thoughts are more fleeting, less all-consuming. I am not living in denial, but the work I did in therapy has given me the ability to better regulate my feelings about cancer and dying. I don’t want to go deep right now, and can put the introspection and dealing with the prognosis aside for a while.
We’ve been starting to plan for the future again – a welcome change. We are planning trips, both as a couple and for the whole family. I’m beginning a watercolor class; I just bought all of the supplies, and we’ll start painting on Wednesday. I have an interview this week to join the hiking patrol for the regional park system, and yesterday we had the first hike for Together on the Path.
Although I haven’t had time to meditate like I wish, and haven’t done as much drawing or writing, I can recognize that I do have control over those things, and it’s really up to me to carve out the time for those activities. But, overall, I like living like this. There’s been little drama, and my life feels quite full of good things. And for all of that, I’m very grateful.