Stoned

I’m lying on my bed, barely able to move. I’m wiped. I have a number of substances in me, and as a result, I’m actually quite relaxed. It feels good to lay here quietly, and comfortably for a while.

I hope I can mimic this mood tomorrow when I go in for my MRI. (I’ll take a travel pack of substances). We will meet with the neural surgeon afterwards and hopefully will have a plan after that. 
On the surface, I have felt mostly at ease about all this. This cutting into my head. I worry a little about how it will turn out. I’d like to function well after it is done. I’d like to function better than I have been. 

If I can’t function, I think I’d just like to be cut loose. Let me fly through the universe. 

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4 thoughts on “Stoned

  1. “Across The Universe”

    Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup
    They slither wildly as they slip away across the universe
    Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my opened mind
    Possessing and caressing me
    Jai Guru Deva OM

    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world

    Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes
    They call me on and on across the universe
    Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letter box
    They tumble blindly as they make their way across the universe
    Jai Guru Deva OM

    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world

    Sounds of laughter, shades of life are ringing through my open ears
    Inciting and inviting me
    Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns
    It calls me on and on, across the universe
    Jai Guru Deva OM

    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world
    Nothing’s gonna change my world

    Jai Guru Deva
    Jai Guru Deva
    Jai Guru Deva
    Jai Guru Deva
    Jai Guru Deva

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